Tracing back to the Medieval Period, both “dower” and “curtesy” are legal terms and sometimes concerns in real property law. Legally, the estate of dower is held by a widow upon her husband’s death and consists of a life estate of one-third (sometimes up to one-half) of the land owned by her husband. Naturally, there is the “issue” of whether he held a freehold interest in the land, what is known in real estate contracts as a “fee simple” and the land is inheritable by the issue of the marriage. “Issue” is the fancy legal name for natural born children (no step-children) and other lineal descendants of the husband’s and wife’s marriage such as grandchildren (children of their legal descendants).
Meanwhile, curtesy is a husband’s right to the estate and property of his deceased wife, if a child was born when they were married.
Modern property law, at least in the U.S., has abolished dower and curtsey and replaced it with what is known as “elective share” or a percentage of the deceased spouse’s estate. The spouse may elect or chose between what was provided in the deceased spouse’s will or the share provided in the statute. The good thing about the elective share option, especially in these days, is it prevents a spouse from disinheriting the other. Yet, none of that has to do with dower in the Regency era.
Hopefully, I have not lost you yet. Allow me to simplify all the mumbo jumbo above: A dower ensured that a widow received support and a portion of her husband’s property when he passed on. Curtesy granted a husband interest in his wife’s property upon her death. It also prevented the husband from conveying his wife’s estate to anyone else but their child(ren).
I did a lot of research on this topic when I wrote His Christmas Violet. (Stopping a second or two for a shameless promo…)
His Christmas Violet: A Second Chance Regency Romance
Sir Frederick Nolan stayed true to his late wife through all their years of marriage, but now he is widower and has waited the proper mourning period, he sees no reason he should not finally know the happiness of having Lady Violet Graham at his side. He meant to marry Violet when he was fresh from his university years and she was but a young lady; however, the realization she was perfect for him had come too late, and Violet had already accepted the proposal of Lord Graham.
Lady Violet Graham never strayed from the love she held for Sir Frederick, but she had proven herself a good wife to her late husband, serving dutifully as Lord Giles Graham’s chatelaine and presenting him three sons. Now, her widow’s pension and the use of the dower house will provide her the only freedom she has ever known as a woman. She cannot think to become another man’s “property,” even when that man is the only one she has every loved. Enough is enough when it comes to having no voice in her future.
They have been in each others’ pockets, so to speak, since they were children, but how does Sir Frederick convince Lady Violet to marry him, when she is most determined never again to permit any man dominion over her person, even though they both know they would be great together?
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BookBub https://www.bookbub.com/books/his-christmas-violet-a-second-chance-regency-romance-by-regina-jeffers
Now, back to the issue of dower and curtsey…
Originally there were varieties of dower (not to be confused with dowry) such as dower ad ostium ecclesiae (“at the church door”) and dower ex assensu patris (by the heir with his father’s consent), in which before the couple was married, the wife was endowed of particular pieces of the property – specific lands. In Medieval times more so than modern ones, sometimes land held in knight service was exonerated from dower by the widow’s taking dower de la pluis beale (“of the most fair”) of her husband’s socage land.
By the 16th century, dower at common law or subject to local customs under which dower might extend to a quarter, a half, or even the whole of the land was the law by which most operated. Except where the wife had been endowed of specific lands, she was entitled to have her land assigned “by metes and bounds” by the heir within her quarantine—that is, the 40 days during which the Magna Carta (1215) permitted her to remain in her husband’s house after his death. This is very much what happens in His Christmas Violet, for my lovely Lady Violet Graham possesses two sons carved very much in their father’s hard-nosed image.
The right to dower could be barred by the wife before marriage accepting a jointure (a life estate in specified lands) in lieu of dower, or by the complicated uses to bar dower invented in the 18th century.
As was stated in common law by the early 1800s, a widow who had been married for at least 2 years was entitled to one-third of her husband’s property on his death. This was her dower. That is not dowry. Dowry is what she brought to the marriage, and dower was what she was supposed to receive when the husband died.
Let us simply some of this once more. Unfortunately, sometimes in times of wars and plagues and epidemics, there could be several widows in a family. It would be a most unfortunate man who found himself not only dead, but with little property left upon his death. If each wife was entitled to a third as a widow, what was there left to his sons? Sometimes the woman took this property to a second husband as her “dowry,” though it was supposed to return to the first husband’s family on her death.The fear of a widow taking the property to a second husband and the way dower cut up property made men look for alternatives. They decided on a jointure. This was an annuity based on the income of a specific piece of property or a sum of money. This was paid to her in lieu of any other inheritance. Quite often payment ceased on remarriage. A woman was often cheated because she was deprived of her right of dower even if the sum of money left to her was less tan £100 a year. Also, if all the land was entailed or settled on another, she had trouble receiving her dower.
For example, Lady Blessington’s husband first gave her a jointure of around 4 or 5000 £. He changed that later to 2000, while increasing the amount of money for the man he forced his daughter to marry. Lady Blessington’s jointures was to be from the income of one of his Irish estates. She received this money for several years until the potato famine hit. The income from that estate shrank until there was none. As Lady Blessington was not entitled to any money from any other source, she felt the pinch. She had to sell all her belongings and go live abroad, where she died shortly thereafter.
You may find more on Lady Blessington in this piece on Auctioning Off the Household Goods During the Regency Era.
By the Dower Act (1833), dower in England was restricted to realty still owned by the husband at his death and not devised by his will. It could also be barred by a declaration in his will or by deed. As a small measure of compensation to widows, the act extended dower to equitable interests. The Administration of Estates Act (1925) abolished dower in the United Kingdom, but it continued to be observed in a number of common-law jurisdictions, often in a modified form. The modern tendency, however, is either to abolish it or to replace it with other, less arbitrary means of providing for widows.
Every Woman Dreams... 
Fascinating article thanks for sharing. Just curious, if her son marries is she still addressed as Dowager?
Think about the two Lady Granthams in Downton Abbey. Cora was Lady Grantham, but so was Violet. There had to be a means to separate them when both were in the same room. Violet could be referred to as the Dowager Countess Lady Grantham, but only if doing so was necessary for to know of which one a person spoke.
Generally, when the present peer is unmarried, by custom the widow of the late peer continues to call herself as she did when her husband was living, i.e., without the prefix of (a) dowager, or (b) her Christian name (as above “Lady Grantham). Should the present peer marry (as did Robert Crawley in Downton), it is usual for the widowed peeress to announce the style by which she wishes to be know in future.” (Titles) This last bit is 20th century, and Black’s agrees: most widows do not use “dowager” at all anymore, and simply use the Mary, Countess of X option, announcing in the press the style they will be using.
Invitations to court and the lady’s name in the newspaper or on formal lists (as in the list of those who attended a Queen’s birthday bash) would use dowager if there was another one with her same title. If there was more than one widow, the first widow is the dowager and the others are Mary Countess of X. The main purpose was to avoid confusion between or among ladies. One never addressed the lady as a dowager in person. One only spoke of her as the dowager when it was necessary to distinguish her from any other living Countess of Someplace. As a twelve-year-old girl (Think how girls as young as 12 could marry) could actually be a dowager, the term was not connected to age. However, because older women were usually dowagers (in the upper crust) and people spoke slightingly of sitting among the dowagers and chaperones, the widows decided they did not like the word. If a woman wanted to present her granddaughter at court, or her new daughter-in-law, she would have to describe herself as a Dowager Countess, for instance. Ordinarily, though, she would not use the term, at all.
You can find more on the use of “dowager” on my post HERE: https://reginajeffers.blog/2020/10/12/use-of-the-word-dowager-during-the-regency-era/
Interesting. In one of P.G. Wodehouse’s comic masterpieces there is a Dower House, separate from but close to a mansion. Presumably built for a “relict!”
It’s been more years than I care to admit since reading anything P.G. Wodehouse, though I imagine if I had read the bit about a Dower House then, I would not have taken much notice of the term.